are you ready yet?

Swinging moods. Sometimes I wish it wasn't my mood that had been swinging. oh well.

I've been thinking some more about when it's the best time to go back home. I don't fit here. It's a well known fact and I think there's only so long you can go pretending it's not happening. Everything i feel clashes with what I think and vice-versa. That's not very healthy. I'm already a weird person. The type that gets confused and changes her mind so much, she ends up not making any choices. so i sit and watch them go.

Don't get me wrong, it is not as if things aren't happening. But it is the way they are happening. Whenever I have these thoughts and start wondering so much, that's when I find a new "trouble" to keep me away from thinking, of concerning, of worrying about what really should be dealt with.

But it is ok for now. I have a good feeling, even if my week hasn't been that great. I have a feeling something is really about to change.

Oh the changes that never happen... where have you been?

Yesterday I looked at you and I thought you were teasing me. Today I think you were just surrendering. Ready to get the lace around the neck. I'll take you for a walk, let you watch my heels go. just like sanity has gone... slow pace. step after step getting closer to the real fun.

the fun that has just began, don't you think? cat and mouse. hunter and hunted. the catch and the chaser. the freedom of enjoying who we really are.

on heels I'm on the go. I will let you watch me go slow.

I'll turn my back to see you crawling. I've been waiting for that, to hear you calling for me.

are you ready yet?