let me guess

... as always. you come and go.

as fast as a rocket. slip through my fingers, never leave traces of your tempting existence.

and as always, you tease. you say you'll stay but you leave.

i bet a hundred bucks we won't meet.

damn our profecy.

...

On a bright note and not as poetic, well, things have been just normal. I've changed jobs; then changed my mood again and got back to what I was previously doing. It's been a "catching up" phase for so long now. I feel like properly starting new things. But knowing myself the way I do, I know that I better watch to not let things unfinished again.

I've been thinking a lot about the book! yeah! I want to get back to it. But I feel really down about my pictures. lack of inspiration maybe? I've been trying. But ideas don't really come to me that easily just now.

Probably the main problem's been I'm tired of using timer and rushing from behind to front of the camera. I need a model. hopefully I'll find one. But I also know that making things depend on other things just get your problems in a chain...

I'm enjoying the beggining of winter. I always feel that autumn is just too short. at least the whole cerimonial thing, the visual part of autumn... maybe there's some consolation for me. maybe winter will be windy and bring me some news. fresh air. a beautiful woman. or man...

when the phone rings

I have to confess guilty of those pre-judgement things lovers do. I'm crap at playing games and don't really like having to read between the lines. Basically, I'm no fortune teller and you're no crystal ball.

Said that, everytime the phone rings, after these long periods of silence, it's like the silence is not the only thing being broken. There's this constant flux inside of me that is broken; the rationality and peace is disturbed. I like noise, distorted sounds, I like you bursting the bubble around me. But you never get inside.

Gravitational state of mind, I sit and listen to all you have to say, I distract you with comments to avoid to answer questions, I keep the answers to myself. But you always sneak and get the information you want. it's the power you have over me that seduces me; the mystery surrounding your vague explanations and the reasons why you decided to call.

we talk silly, never like lovers. we pretend we don't know where we stand. but everytime we feel cold and distant, we go back to reactivate our connection; it's a circle of pleasure and trade. my vicious headache. I write it all to call it to an end, but there you stand, ahead of me, to read me and hold me and get me started again.

lovers don't share stories. they share memories and secrets.

we don't know what's in between our ends, but we know where to go when desire strikes.

dance till you drop... on your knees, down my...

yeah.

down my ... yeah.

could be anything, yeah?

I could bend alllllllll the possible ways.

super elastic.

Im glad my knee doesn't hurt anymore and that I'm slowly getting back to drinking again. finished the second part of "read too much, wrote too little" and now, am just waiting...

for... yeah ;)

Im happy. hope you are too.